He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
