Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
