Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Randomize
