I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Randomize
