It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
