some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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