Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Mom said you looked used
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I touched a dick in church today
Randomize
