it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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