Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
