People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
