Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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