i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
worst night to have a conscience
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize
