As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
