Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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