This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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