YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
