Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
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