Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Randomize
