You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize
