what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Randomize
