I puked a lego.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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