I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
We had to coat check the pizza.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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