We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
