OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Randomize
