He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
