My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
