I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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