She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize
