i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
