eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
