I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
