just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
