last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
