you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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