Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
