Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
