Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize