I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
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