you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
You need Xanax blowdarts
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Randomize
