I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Randomize
