My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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