I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Randomize
