i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I just had sex on a roof
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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