She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
she smelled like a LAN party
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
