He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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