problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
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