singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
