My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Randomize