I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Randomize
