I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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