My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
you guys were way drunker than both of me
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize
