Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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